Well isn't life Ironic..Dont you think ?.

  Im stating to believe that life dosent want me to get used to anything. Nothing at all .
     Friends, Mentors,Cities none of that is constant in my life.
           As I have said before I just moved out of the States to Colombia ,thing that i hated at the beggining but now Ican say Im pretty happy about that change. But my life could not be complete without drastic changes rigth ?? Lets just say that there was a family dream of living somewhere that naver came true until ..now where there is the sligth possibility of translating againg.
           Theres this tendency that I practice with out knowing of making friends with older people , thing that i sort of regreted because they graduate early leaving me on my own.Now is a girl with many aspirations and dreams that im certain will become a reality , and she is leaving to achive those dreams in a couple of months.And I am scared to think  how we will both react in the abscence of the other.
           Some people hate their teachers.I am one of those people that think the complete opposite no matter how hard the subject is and how strict the educator acts like.This junior year I have found myself thinking that I have met some of the best teachers that I had ever had the honor to meet .But they are leaving, going to teach to other kids around the world. And I cant help but to feel sad.Its creepy and wierd at the same time !

          This has happened everytime and every where I am .Im thinking that its better not to get used to anything .So that when that certain person or thing is missing and out of your life forever you dont miss it too much or its easier to let go off.

Ingnorance.

After 7 years of being out of my country ,most people would think that my conection with the country has decrease.But in 7 years i have felt most Venezuelan than ever.And by coming back for the first time in 6 years and see it so deteriorated and in such a bad state I have to admit that I had hope in this coming elections.
             But now all of it is gone.
          The hope of going to my country and feelling safe.The hope for the future for my 12 little cousins.That in her last years my Great grandma would have a  a decent life.That my ccousin that just graduated would have many opportunities. 
              They were just wishes,hopes and fairytales.   
                                                                                   Chavez 54%,Capriles 44% .RIP my dear County.

Dreams and Hopes..What for...?

      Yes it sounds deppresing.But in my mind its true.

                          I am a dreamer and I have many hopes and dreams.Some for 20 years down the path and others for now.

     I have this thing ,where to calm myself and stop thinking about things that may go wrong I just dream of the perfect day.Where my dreams come true and everything works the way I want to .
         But that ussually never happens.
     Its ussually me meeting sombady I have an intense respect or admiration for.
         The most memorable has been meeting Jhon Lennon were we talked in a little cafe in london ,where he sang Imagine to me.(I woke up crying)

        My daydreams in the U.S were about the trip that i was going to take next year.

      Now...
          ...
       ..
                  I felt like what am i supposed to do now.What would i go in my dreams, who would i meet .And at the beggining it was nothing,nobody came up.
             But it migth sound dumb.But my daydreaming is about me.

       Me on a stage . (I know it sound incredibly cliche)
                           But sadly its true

Under Pressure

Not only one of  the best musical collaborations in the history of Rock & Roll.
            But it pretty much sums up my feelings rigth now.

 Since I moved to a whole new different and strange country.I go to a new whole different and strange school.Who is pretty much 100 times much more demanding and ahead of my normal high school.Not only that, my dad has to pay for my education sort of a college before college.

         First day of school teacher gives the date for the first test.Math is deffinetly not my strong point,and because its the kind of math I have not taken.I Feel pretty much.Screwd.
I dont want to dissapoint my parents.My teachers and most important.

  Myself.

Why

why.

 WHY .
     
          Why.
 Why is it that with wars being fougth ,Countries falling apart and kids dying from disease I write about being sad.With all the things happening rigth now I just worry how my First Day of School is going to be or if I'll make any friends or just the simple fact that I miss many things.Why cant I just get over the fact that some things are gone for good and may never comeback,and start worrying about more important things like how the world is falling apart in all of its aspects.I feel selfish and ignorant to the things that the world asks for and to the ones that definetly needs.

Scared to Death

 First Day of School.
 
     Remember when it was Pre-K and you entered the classroom, shared some toys and became the best of friends.Ohh how I wish it was that simple againg.Once you pass that stage it becomes so difficult to socialize.
We start to worry about the clothes,backpacks or the kind of lunch their mom made them.
Then we pass to the stage of how their body looks,whether or not they have an accent or the way you fix your hair.

   I have to admit that in the five years that I lived in the US I made one good friend that I really hope I still have contact when millions of minutes pass. And in my whole life I haved only made one great friend ,that can be considered my best friend.

I am a friendly person, Im not an anti-social or anyhting like that ,its just that I have had some rough times during my 14 years of being in school.
Ive never had more than three years in a school.I went to 3 Pre-ks, 3 Elementary school,2 middle schools and recently I have tranfered countries and will start my Junior year in a new Colombian High School.

I have to say that my worst expirience had to be the 7th grade.What a terrible year.It was by it self atrocious.I was a short shubby girl with glasses,an accent and (according to people) Horrible music taste.I used to get teased by the students , which I could live with ,they were immature 7th graders ,whatever.But what happens when an autority figure joins into the teasing and name calling.When the person you should trust is not there to help you,but to make you feel like everyone else in the class.I lived with that trougth the year of 2008-2009.Want to know the worst part.

I never told anyone.

Tommorow is going to be the start of a new school year for me.A new year to attemp all my goals and hopes for college.But also to break my shell ,stablish friendships and plan towards the future.
I hope...NO.I am sure that the 7th grade episode wont repeat and that this will be a great year.

With the Best face foward I say Adiu

Used to.

Why is it when you are enjoying the things to the max, something comes and turns your world upside down.Well the person who said things come in unexpected ways , wasnt wrong.

    The thing is that as I stated in the post thats under this one.I just moved to Colombia, and after 5 years of living in the U.S and finally adapting to its culture and ways of life.A South American culture sound dull and out off the map.Which I know its not true.Or atleast intend to hope for the best.
   I used to live in a little calm town in Florida.Now I live in a small noisy city in the middle of Colombia.I used to go to a public high school  with a population of 3,892 (900 in my class of 2014).Now Im about to attend a private school with only 607 students (from pre-k to 12th Grade)

 But then againg Im also used to live in a society where many simple things are taking for granted .Where simple things like a Thank you or Your Welcome have become obsolete and Where Family and its values are of a secondary status.

As I try to get away from the things that I used to have and to start to get used to the things I have now.I realize that Im not as Flexible or Used to the Constant Change as I thougth I was.

 Hoping for the best and puting the best Face foward.


P.S It would be nice if  somebody is reading this.(I mean you in front of the screen) .It would be even nicer if you let me know you are there .